Looking for help to enjoy and redo music: music therapy

I have experienced trauma over the years and am interested to see if music therapy can help. I love music but one of the things I face is shame and embarrassment. I was a musician in a small indie band on tour, but it ended up being a bad experience as the leader was extremely negative and overly critical. They even threw things away and there were places we weren’t allowed to replay because of the way they treated the room staff.

I think nothing that I play, sing or write is worth trying. I am also autistic so I don’t know but it could also have something to do with my writing skills.

Can someone point me in the right direction?

I’m scared of dying and not being creative enough with my time / not leaving anything behind etc. thank you in advance


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